Joke: Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?”

by Rebecca on September 16, 2012

in Pet Talk

Not really animal related, but fun and I wanted to share it.

The following 15 police comments were taken from actual police car videos
around the country.

#15 “Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch
after you wear them a while.”

# 14 “If you take your hands off the car, I’ll make your birth certificate a
worthless document.”

#13 “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.”

#12 “Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that’s the
speed of the bullet that’ll be chasing you.”

#11 “You don’t know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can
write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?”

#10 “Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don’t think
it will help. Oh, did I mention that I’m the shift supervisor?”

#9 “Warning! You want a warning? O. K., I’m warning you not to do that
again or I’ll give you another ticket.”

#8 “The answer to this last question will determine whether you are
drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?”

#7 “Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go
to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and corn dogs and step in monkey poo. ”

#6 “Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster
oven.”

#5 “In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.”

#4 “How big were those ‘Just two beers’ you say you had?”

#3 “No sir, we don’t have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we’re allowed
to write as many tickets as we can.”

#2 “I’m glad to hear that chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend
of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.”

AND THE WINNER IS …

#1 “You didn’t think we give pretty women tickets? You’re right, we don’t.
Sign here.”

 


Previous post:

Next post: