The American Way

by Rebecca on June 29, 2014

in Animal Jokes

The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized that if
they continued in the usual manner they were going to blow up the whole
world. One day they sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with
one dog fight. They would have five years to breed the best fighting dog in
the world and which ever side’s dog won would be entitled to dominate the
world. The losing side would have to lay down its arms.

The Russians found the biggest meanest Doberman and Rottweiler bitches in
the world and bred them with the biggest meanest Siberian wolves. They
selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from each litter, removed his
siblings which gave him all the milk. They used steroids and trainers and
after five years came up with the biggest meanest dog the world had ever
seen. Its cage needed steel bars that were five inches thick and nobody
could get near it.

When the day came for the dog fight, the Americans showed up with a strange
animal. It was a nine foot long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for the
Americans because they knew there was no way that this dog could possibly
last ten seconds with the Russian dog. When the cages were opened up, the
Dachshund came out of it’s cage and slowly waddled over towards the Russian
dog. The Russian dog snarled and leaped out of it’s cage and charged the
American dachshund. But, when it got close
enough to bite the Dachshund’s neck, the Dachshund opened it’s mouth and
consumed the Russian dog in one bite. There was nothing left at all of the
Russian dog.

The Russians came up to the Americans shaking their heads in disbelief. “We
don’t understand how this could have happened. We had our best people
working for five years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler bitches in
the world and the biggest meanest Siberian wolves.”

“That’s nothing”, an American replied. “We had our best plastic surgeons
working for five years to make an alligator look like a Dachshund.”

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