Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and then Complain About Our Pets
1. The pets live here. You don’t.
2. If you don’t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
(That’s why it’s called “fur”niture.)
3. To you, our pets are just animals. To us, they are an adopted
son/daughter who happens to be hairy, walks on all fours and doesn’t speak
4. Dogs and cats are better than kids because:
– they don’t ask for money all the time
– they are easier to train
– they usually come when called
– they don’t hang out with drug-using friends
– they don’t need a gazillion dollars for a college education, and
– if they get pregnant, you can sell the children.