A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. “My dog’s cross eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?”
“Well,” says the vet, “let’s have a look at him” So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says “I’m going to have to put him down.”
“What? Because he’s cross-eyed?”
“No, because he’s really heavy”
From AnimalJokes.net
My neighbor found out that her dog, a Schnauzer, could hardly hear, so she
took it to the veterinarian.
The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog’s ears.
After he cleaned both ears, the dog could then hear fine.
The vet then told the lady that, if she wanted to keep this from recurring,
she should buy some “Nair” hair remover and rub it in the dog’s ears once a
month.
The lady went to the store and bought some “Nair” hair remover. At the
register, the pharmacist told her, “If you’re going to use this under your
arms, don’t use deodorant for a few days.”
The lady said, “I’m not using it under my arms.”
The pharmacist said, “Well if you’re using it on your legs,
don’t shave for a couple of days.”
The lady replied, “I’m not using it on my legs.
If you must know, I’m using it on my Schnauzer.”
The pharmacist says, “Well then stay off your bicycle for about a week.”
